


Have You No Idea That You're In Deep?

by god-damn-it-Gerome (Just_East)



Series: Big Gay High School AU [5]
Category: Fire Emblem Echoes: Mou Hitori no Eiyuu Ou | Fire Emblem Echoes: Shadows of Valentia
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, M/M, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-04
Updated: 2018-07-04
Packaged: 2019-06-05 09:08:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15167360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Just_East/pseuds/god-damn-it-Gerome
Summary: Gray and alcohol had a history.He was having fun, and no one was getting hurt, so it was fine.





	Have You No Idea That You're In Deep?

**Author's Note:**

> Do I Wanna Know by Arctic Monkeys

Gray and alcohol had a history.

He'd had his first drink when he was twelve. His mother had been lenient with this kinda thing. She'd rather he drink alcohol than do drugs.

Couldn't get addicted to alcohol, she'd say.

Gray had first gotten drunk when he was fourteen, his very first party, and he'd gotten so smashed that Tobin and Alm had to basically carry him home.

It had been amazing.

He had almost told Tobin he loved him then. Liquid courage it was. Maybe he _had_ told Tobin... Gray couldn't remember.

It didn't matter. The older he got, the easier alcohol was to get a hold of. He looked older than he was, and no one really minded.

He was having fun and no one was getting hurt.

So he was beyond confused when he slipped into the cafeteria at lunch and Tobin wasn't at their usual table.

He thudded down on the bench with a groan, his head pounding.

"Where's Tobi?" He mumbled out, hiding his face in his folded arms.

"He's sitting with Python, Forsyth and Lukas." Alm sounded hesitant.

"Why?" Gray looked up blearily, noticing the back of Tobin's head exactly where Alm said he'd be.

"Because you're an asshole who needs to get his shit together." Kliff said, tone unforgiving.

"What?" Gray groaned out again, letting his head hit the table.

God, he needed to drink more water next time.

"I said: You're an assho-"

"Yeah, I heard that part." Gray cut him off.

He huffed and stood up, balance a little off.

"Are you still drunk?" Kliff asked with a glare.

"Unfortunately not." Gray gave a weak grin before slowly making his way over to the table that Tobin was sitting at.

Before he could quite make it, Lukas was in front of him, steering him away.

"What? Lukas?" Gray frowned.

Lukas' hand was gentle on his back, but he put his body in between Gray and Tobin.

"Gray, I fear Tobin is quite upset with you." His voice was soft and grave.

"Why?" Gray frowned deeper, even as he allowed Lukas to steer him back to his usual table.

"A couple of reasons..." Lukas paused. "Its probably best you let him come to you first."

Once back at his table, Gray dropped down onto the bench, confused.

Lukas smiled sadly at Gray and the rest of the table before leaving.

Gray watched numbly as Tobin, followed by Forsyth, Python and then Lukas left the cafeteria.

Gray didn't come into school the next day. Or the day after.

He stayed in his room, ignoring his feelings in favour of vodka.

~

Both of Gray's sisters had left home, one about to graduate university, the other already had a job in the next city over. They didn't often come home. Read as they hadn't been home since they left.

They still called Gray occasionally, but Gray couldn't deny how betrayed he felt when the one time he had tried to call and they hadn't picked up.

If there had been a picture in the dictionary next to 'self destructing', Gray's face would have been next to it.

He hadn't spoken to Tobin in weeks.

He knew better than to try to go over to his house. Tobin's younger siblings didn't seem to understand what was wrong, but they didn't hesitate to inform Gray that Tobin was still very mad.

Gray didn't even remember what he'd done to make Tobin so upset.

Tobin had never refused to speak with him before.

Gray wondered if he was going to lose his mind.

It felt like he already had.

His chest was burning from all the vodka, his throat was raw from all the vomiting he'd done during the times he stopped drinking enough to be hungover.

He barely went to school.

His coach and teachers had called his mother, only to come face to face with the rubber of her skin. Everything bounced off her, nothing stuck.

So Gray was left alone. In his misery and with his drinks.

~

Gray's mother was out at work, as she always seemed to be these days, when there was a knock at the door.

Gray was hungover, trying to keep the cereal he'd just eaten down.

He groaned at the noise, but trudged up to the door.

He was wearing soft sweatpants and a t shirt that had seen better days.

He opened the door, beyond surprised to see Clive.

"Clive?" He asked, confused.

"Hey, Gray." Clive's expression was serious even though he kept his tone light.

"What can I do for ya, Captain?" Gray asked with a tired grin.

Honestly, it hurt to look at Clive, he felt like a reminder of a time that was long past.

"I was hoping to come in so we could talk?" He sounded odd. Hopeful?

"Uh, sure?" Gray said and opened the door further.

"What do you want to talk about?" Gray asked once he'd closed the door behind Clive.

"Your drinking problem, Gray." Clive said gravely.

"My what?" Gray laughed, but it didn't sound happy.

Clive wasn't laughing.

Gray swallowed down the bile that threatened to rise again.

This couldn't be real.

"You have a problem, Gray." Clive repeated.

Gray knew it for a fact.

He didn't have a problem.

"When was the last time you were sober and not hungover?" His voice was soft. It almost reminded Gray of Lukas.

But Clive was wrong.

He had it under control.

"Gray?" Clive sounded concerned.

Concern.

Gray felt faint.

He didn't need help. He had it under control.

"Please let me help you."

Gray couldn't help the way he folded.

"Please." He said quietly. "Please help me."


End file.
